Vulgaria 2012

Opening with a ten-second countdown, the movie gives ‘weaker’ audience members a chance to exit the cinema before attempting to offend you with its supposedly controversial R-rated-ness. That’s a tad presumptuous for a movie about porn that contains absolutely no nudity.

The disjointed narrative goes wherever the hell wants to go, not seeming to give a damn about whether or not the scene pushes the plot forward just as long as it can rub off another one of its unfunny innuendo gags. The vulgar humour presented lacks any wit or inventiveness, playing to the assumption that simply mentioning a reproductive organ or alluding to a taboo sexual act equates to instant laughs. It doesn’t, no matter how hard the movie repeatedly tries to convince you that it does.

The only thing I vaguely admired from Vulgaria was one admittedly creative act involving oral sex and pop rocks that may or may not have perked my curiosity a little too highly. Hide