Geostorm

Geostorm

(2017)

Brave the storm.

In the near future, climate control satellites malfunction, causing disasters across the globe. The end of the world looms and the only solution is to send Gerard Butler into space. Independence Day and Stargate co-writer/producer Dean Devlin's directorial debut.... More

When catastrophic climate change endangers Earth's very survival, world governments unite and create the Dutch Boy Program: a world wide net of satellites armed with geoengineering technologies designed to stave off the natural disasters. After successfully protecting the planet for two years, something is starting to go wrong. Two estranged brothers are tasked with solving the program's malfunction before a world wide Geostorm can engulf the planet.Hide

Flicks Review

Look, this is not a clever movie. Geostorm paints a future where we lose control of our climate-controlling satellites because someone HACKS THE WEATHER and causes un-natural disasters. Gerard Butler, the most Scottish of American heroes, plays the satellites’ creator and the one space scientist who could possibly fix this mess because, I guess, he never taught anyone else how to. That’s just the tip of this polar dunce cap, but if you’re the kind of person who hunts for a “good bad movie” then beer yourself up because this is the most entertaining two-star film of 2017.... More

The first 80 minutes set up the ludicrous plot with a slab of American politicking, a blatantly obvious whodunnit mystery, and clichéd brotherly angst between Butler and Jim “Sweaty Head” Sturgess. Abbie Cornish does her best T-1000 impression as a Secret Service Agent to President Andy García while Zazie Beetz, playing it appropriately loose and fun, seems to be the only one who got the memo on how silly this premise is.

It would be a dull way to get to the action if it wasn’t for all the stupendously stupid stuff sprinkled throughout: a person introducing their name despite wearing a name badge, Butler mansplaining satellites to the chief satellite commander, the fact that they have handguns in this goddamn space station. To the film’s credit, it doesn’t make America the sole saviour and emphasises how the world needs to cooperate to protect Earth – it’s as if Captain Planet wrote a Michael Bay disaster flick.

Everything leads to a climax that pulls the ripcord on all seriousness with hail boulders and desert tsunamis. The CGI work wobbles all over the place, often reaching for Gravity quality as it dips its toes in Sharknado juice, but remains originally bonkers. When the film introduces a literal ‘Countdown to GEOSTORM’, it hits peak dumb in the best way possible.Hide


The Peoples' Reviews

Average ratings from 3 ratings, 2 reviews
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BY MataAnus nobody

Geostorm is a really awesome concept for a movie and is performed really well in all aspects. 5 stars.


I knew this coming in but if I was desperate to see something and time restraints and all. So I bought my ticket like a good little monkey. It so silly its ludicrous, so so many 'what the heck' moments but I was entertained so I stuck it out. I can imagine this will be a disastrous disaster film . Gerard, honey please go back to fluffy romances back the crap away from any action flick that comes sneakily across your desk, please... Come on Geostorm , with a title like that you just know it... More shouldve been on the syfy network. See it if you are really rich or stupid if none of the above stay well clear and download it later.Hide


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The Press Reviews

  • "Geostorm" uses digital technology to lay waste to a bunch of cities and hacky screenwriting to assault the dignity of several fine actors. Full Review

  • "Geostorm" has a more clever premise than it needs to get to its ultimate goal of trashing some of our planet's nicest places. But the results are still mostly dull-witted. Full Review

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